Hey, the weather's still good, the weekend approaches — let's just get right into it:
A rookie Pasco County Deputy was arrested in Broward County by authorities who claim he went there to meet an underage boy for sex, proving there might still be abusers dumb enough to be tricked into crossing county lines with the intent of committing a sex crime by assuming the internet always tells the truth.
Two criminal mastermindsstole a woman's wallet at a Tampa Publix, then immediately went about a mile down Dale Mabry and used her money to buy $1,000 worth of crap in the same clothes, under the security cameras of a nearby Target, setting up a pretty much indefensible timeline. *Standing ovation from incarcerated thieves who thought their caper was the dumbest*
A 23-year-old Zephyrhills manhas been charged with aggravated animal cruelty after being seen on video punching and further tormenting a dog. Funny aside: In the Times piece, the suspect is mistakenly referred to only as "McClurg." Not-so-funny truth: McClurg needs to have so many leeches attached to his testicles one by one that his scrotum eventually comes to resemble Medusa's head.
And finally, two of the four men recently arrested for "indecent behavior" in a sting operation at a Polk County park turned out to be attraction operators at Disney. Hmm — small world.